Doc Savageland

PATRIARCHY, CIVILIZATION, MILITARISM, AND DEMOCRACY...

2009-11-12T17:49:00.002-05:00

Here is the first part in a 5-part documentary made by the Canadian Historian, and commentator, Gwynne Dyer. Very informative, and lots of fun. Enjoy!

THE TAO OF SEX

2009-10-04T16:20:00.003-04:00

I have had a number of conversations and debates as of late about the state of modern filmmaking; my position being that they rely too much on flashy camera work and an appalling sense of pace, and this all urged me to write about the Tao of Sex, because the filmmaking process, is a lot like sex.

How we approach lovemaking is like good filmmaking, you want to take your time, don’t go for broke right away, as it can have a numbing affect. You want to hold back giving your audience what they want by dancing around the sweet spot for as long as you can, then when the tension is at it’s greatest, BAM! you go for the tender areas. Filmmakers like Michael Bay have one mode, 11, and they never let you get a breather, leaving you to feel like you’ve been bashing your head against the wall for 2 hours. It’s, in a word, annoying.

Imagine, if you will ladies, what it would be like to have sex with Michael Bay, if his lovemaking techniques were anything like his films? Would you not be left feeling sore, and angry?

In fact the over-the-top films we get today are similar to a bad case of premature ejaculation.

Furthermore, the use of the shaking camera, an effect that can only occur in nature when you are looking through a lens, just screams “I’m watching a film!” and not, “I’m participating in a story!” Seriously, when, other than when you look through a lens do you see camera wobble? Even if I stumble home drunk my vision carries more clarity.

When you lay down on your partner, do you flail around like you are having a seizure, in the hopes that your berserker enthusiasm will give your lover pleasure? What sounds more sensuous, a paint shaker, or a slow unwavering hand?

I have always felt that being steady, controlled, and accurately focusing on your goals was the way to give pleasure. The filming of a sequence is no different.

It’s also imperative that you not rely on the same techniques over and over. Everyone will respond differently when certain buttons are pushed, so that the more varied you are, the greater the likelihood you will stumble across the ones that your partner, or viewer will respond the most to.

Film is not the only thing that can be approached in a sexual manner, in fact anything that requires precise and accurate control can be thought of as sex, and thus utilize similar techniques.

I hope this little diatribe encourages you to expect the same quality out of your daily life that you expect to get out of the bedroom.

Which reminds me. It’s almost time to make dinner...

A FEW DOCS TO CHANGE THE WAY YOU SEE THE WORLD...

2009-09-02T16:57:00.002-04:00

I found these documentaries a while back and decided to share them with the rest of whoever is paying attention to this blog.

All the links below are by a Documentarian by the name of Adam Curtis, who works and produced all of the below at the BBC, and has won numerous awards. The running thread in all these films is how elites have used various theories to pacify, and control the masses to either success, failure, or sparking unforeseen results.

I dare you to watch them...

The documentaries are all free to download through a great site called Archive.org, which you might want to check out as it's full of neat stuff you won't find elsewhere.

First up is The Trap: What Happened To Our Dream Of Freedom?
This is one of the most recent, and thus most timely of the docs, and very enlightening.

The we have The Power Of Nightmares. This one is a personal favourite, and will pick up what you think of islamic terrorism, shake it about, and kick it in the trash.

Next is The Century Of The Self. A great four parter that shows how psychology has been used to get you to buy things, and to obey the government, or they try...

The Way Of All Flesh is a freaky one episode doc about how they replicated a woman's cancer cell 50 years ago, and over time, now weighs over 400 times the woman's body weight! (If you put all the cells in one place that is).

The Mayfair Set, shows how the elite of England tried to use economics to remain an important player in world affairs after the end of WWII.

The Living Dead is not a zombie film, but a documentary about how history can be used to trap people into repeating it.

Pandora's Box is a great big 6 part documentary examining the unsuccessful attempt to use science to find a rational means of ordering society after WWII.

Well there you go, I hope you enjoy them.

BIRDS WITH NECKTIES...

2009-07-26T16:52:00.002-04:00

Well boys and girls, another Monday night is coming, and along with that, the last Alfred Hitchcock double bill at the Mayfair.

On Monday night of the 27th, starting at 7 PM is The Birds. It's a fun little story about a multitude of birds that swarm a seaside American town. I can't see what the fuss is all about, being chased by birds can't be all that bad...

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Then at 9:15 PM is Frenzy. One of Hitchcock's last great classics, and considering it was his second last film, it' really is amazing that he still had it in him to put out such a twisted, great, humorous, tense, and engaging thriller.

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I hope you can make it out, and treat yourself to some of the greatest films ever made.

DIZZYING NIGHT OF MADNESS!!!

2009-07-18T21:04:00.003-04:00

Okay boys and girls, another Monday is almost here, which means that another night of Hitchcock movies is coming to the Mayfair theatre.

It will be a fun evening as the Mayfair gets into Hitchcock’s classic Hollywood years.

This Monday, on the 20th, will be playing Vertigo at 7, and then at 9:30 comes Psycho.

Vertigo is considered his most personal film, as it deals with obsession -- and blondes...

Psycho is often looked on as Hitchcock’s greatest film, which is probably due to it being his most intensely suspenseful. After over 40 years it still has the power to shock, which can’t be said for even today’s shockers.

That’s all from me, so I hope you can make it out to the Mayfair theatre to see two of the greatest films ever made.

REALLY WEIRD MOVIES...

2009-06-18T11:20:00.003-04:00

Last night I had the opportunity to see one of the strangest films I've ever seen. It is called THE RETURN OF CAPTAIN INVINCIBLE. Imagine if you will, a bunch of Australians getting together and said, "we want to make a superhero musical that revives the spirit of the Rocky Horror Picture Show!"

Yeah, I know, it sounds like a good idea. I never expected the thing to be good, but the fact that Alan Arkin plays the titular hero Captain Invincible, and Christopher Lee plays the villain Mr. Midnight, and they both sing. This was too much to pass up. How could I might the opportunity to see Dracula/ Saruman sing an early 80's pop number!

The story is about a super hero who's been fighting for the glory of the united states through the prohibition years and WWII only to be challenged by the House of Un-American Activities and called a communist. Angered by all he's done for the US-of-A, he takes off and disappears, only to resurface in modern day Australia, drinking his way into oblivion. Mr. Midnight begins plans for world domination, and Captain Invincible is called back into action. What ensues is a train wreck so freakish, that you can't help but watch, amazed, that this story was created by a human being, and not by a an alien on drugs.

Don't get me wrong, the movie is awful, but of the kind of special awful movie that rarely gets made. It is so whacked and strange, that the unpredictable nature of it is hat makes it watchable. This is the kind of bad movie lovers of bad movies want to see. It is a perfect, get the guys and galls together with a case of beer/whiskey and laugh your heads off on a Saturday night.

The only thing I wonder is, why on earth did someone not hire Christopher Lee to do more musicals.

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STAR WRECK...

2009-05-09T22:10:00.003-04:00

I haven't had a reason to post any new blogs in over a year, but now I came upon one. There's no simple way of saying this, I know it flies in the face of how most people seem to feel, but...

...I didn't like the new Star Trek movie.

In fact I found it shockingly bad, and I'm still sitting in wonder as to how it has garnered so many good reviews. So I thought I would post a review of my own. But first I should warn you if you have not seen the movie yet, my review WILL BE FILLED WITH SPOILERS!!! So if you don't want me to ruin the movie for you, DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER!!! But I assure you, J.J. Abrams and company have already ruined it.

First off, adapting any pre-existing property is a lot like cooking using someone else's recipe, and for something as old as Star Trek, it's a very complicated recipe. So what J.J. Abrams and company did was decide to make dinner, and ignore some of the ingredients. Kind of like they said, "Hey, lets make apple pie like Grandma used to make! Let's get some apples and put them in a frozen pie crust we got from the store, and voila! Apple pie!" (But unless you follow Grandma's recipe, it won't be the same). So in part, I think the writers were totally unaware of many of the ingredients that made Star Trek the phenomenon it has become. But I guess I shouldn't be surprised since the people who wrote this, were the same that gave us the two Transformers movies. Yeah, I hear academy awards coming. Real classics.

Last chance to avoid SPOILERS!!

Okay first off there was no point to the movie. It's just a lame revenge plot. Hell, so was Wrath of Khan, but it was mostly about the crew aging, and it was about how "the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few. Since the very beginning, Star Trek was about something. On a weekly basis the original series broke new ground, and was so daring that they came to the brink of cancelation on a weekly basis because of the subject matter they dealt with. The later series, as much as I disliked all of them for not taking on today's touchy subjects, were still about something! It was a 'weak tea' message, but it was still there nonetheless. It is that key ingredient that has kept Star Trek alive for decades, to take that 'ingredient' away is just plain stupid. It's like having a pizza without the cheese!

So, maybe I missed something, and maybe someone can correct me on this, but Nero goes back in time to kill Spock, only to realize that he's appeared 25 years too early. How does he know this? How does he know that Spock will appear in 25 years? Is time travel that predictable?

Oh, and everyone knows at this point that a Black Hole is not a time tunnel, it's a giant cosmic trash compactor. It just sucks things in and crushes it. The time travel/dimensional door crap is stuff they thought up over 30 years ago, so I guess they never heard of a guy named Stephen Hawking? Did a bit of work on Black Holes? Good stuff? No?

So Spock accidentally destroys the Romulan homeworld. He mentions it in a very brief flashback/mind meld. Okay, we've had a Romulan homeworld for 40 years. In the Star Trek world, it's like a major character, then J.J. just had it destroyed, practically off screen. If you are going to do something major, like destroy a whole planet that has been part of a story for 40 years, at least spend some time to give it the impact it deserves. But J.J. deals with it like a plot devise, as if he has no respect for the material or the world he's working in. Has he never told a story before? I know this, and I've never directed a big budget hollywood movie!

Now the cinematography was appalling. Every shot was shaking, as if the camera operator had cerebral palsy, or maybe the camera was in a paint shaker. Now there are times when shaking the camera is important to do. Obscuring the image is sometimes a necessary tool in the directors bag of tricks, BUT IT IS ONLY ONE OF THEM!! If you keep using the same ones over and over and over again, it gets stale. When it comes to the shaky-cam, it gets downright annoying, because when the camera shakes, you can't see what you're looking at! The motion blur prevents this. To make it worse, all the shots were too close, so that if you aren't watching this on a TV screen, you can barely see what's going on. Oh, sure you know that Kirk just punched that Romulan. but how did he do it? I don't know, I just saw some movement. Remember back when they had cool fights in movies where the actors and stunt people had moves that made you go, "cool!" But here you can't see what they're doing. It's like they choreographed all the fights in a lame way, and the actors physical abilities were piss-poor, so they just shot it in close to hide the ineptitude.

How about the use of lens flare! Wow I loved how 25% of the movie was a blank white screen because of all the lens flare. Save your money folks, just flash a light in your eyes, and you'll know what it was like to watch the new Star Trek. Maybe J.J. Abrams was hoping that all the lens flare, and camera shaking would hide how shitty his movie was.

Okay, the engineering room looked like a boiler room, I shit you not. It's like, even though they had a budget of $150 million, they decided to save money by not building a set, but do what every low budget sci-fi movie does and head to the water treatment plant to shoot, and pretend it's a spaceship. Also there's no visible reactor in this Enterprise, but we get a mile of water pipes! What the fuck does the Enterprise have water pipes for??? Water pipes? On a spaceship???

There's a part where the writers have obviously written themselves into a corner, because they have Spock Captaining the ship, when they really need to get Kirk in command, so this is how they do it. Spock has just watched the planet Vulcan get destroyed, along with his mom (Yeah they really have respect for the subject matter. Not only do they blast Romulous to bits off screen, but they destroy Vulcan and Spocks mom too. Just for the fun of it I guess), so Spock is naturally upset, so what Kirk has to do is taunt Spock until he gets his ass kicked by an enraged Spock, and then jump up and down shouting, "You see! He's emotionally compromised! He can't be Captain! Give me the big chair!!" I'm sorry, but if I just watched someone's home world get destroyed, along with his Mom, and some jackass comes along to taunt him. I'd be helping to hold that said jackass down while he gets a beating, to say nothing of giving the jackass the top spot. Maybe I'm way off base here, but I don't think real people act that way. Sociopaths, maybe, but do most of us? Really???

Okay, and at the end, when Nero's ship is about to blow up, and Kirk says I'll save your life, to which Nero replies "No! I'd rather die!" So Kirk says, "Okay! fire!" I'm sorry, but even in Star Trek 3, 10 minutes after Commander Kruge has just killed Kirk's only son, he still tries to save Kruge's life by pulling him away from the cliff. If they took Kirk's character seriously, he wouldn't have given Nero a choice, he would have just pulled him out to safety and placed him in jail. It would have made Nero more angry, and given Kirk a more satisfying revenge. So the nobility and morality that has been a part of Star Trek for 40 years was seen to be stale and out-of-touch for today's audience?

But that is part of the problem with what they did with Star Trek. It's like sugar water. It's a formulaic movie that's only goal is to provide instant gratification. You get your hit, and then in seconds it's over. I guarantee you, this movie will be forgotten in a few years. The day after you see it, you won't be still talking about it, because there is no depth to it. There is no way it will be a lasting draw to the coffers of Paramount the way the other Trek films were, and still are.

Star Trek was long overdue for a revamping, but the messages it told about our lives, society, and science was not the problem. The problem was bad writing, inept producing, uninspiring casting, and weak characters. But it seemed to J.J. Abrams that the problem was the Star Trek world itself, so he changed it. No that's not true, he ignorantly picked it up, and kicked it out the window. Abrams has admitted many times that he never liked Star Trek. So why did he get the job?

So sadly we've had Lucas screw up Star Wars with the unholy prequels. Lucas AND Speilberg vomit all over Indiana Jones, and now we've had J.J. Abrams shit all over Star Trek. What other lasting film/tv series will be ruined yet, I wonder?

Heston RIP?

2008-04-16T10:39:00.003-04:00

Well last week Charlton Heston died. I have certainly enjoyed some of his movies over the years, but I think he totally undermined his own popularity by his own actions as President of the NRA. Not that I have a problem with gun ownership. There are plenty of responsible gun owners, but you can't legally allow something as dangerous as guns amid the public without rules, because not everyone is going to be so trustworthy with them, which is why in Canada, since we instituted the FAC (Firearms Acquisition Certificate), no one can legally own a firearm without also undergoing rather extensive training in how to safely use firearms. They don't have that in the US, so the average gun owner in the US relies on Uncle Bubba to train him/her on the safe use of firearms.

A rather interesting and politically unpopular fact has come out in a Canadian study that looked at the drop in accidents, injuries and deaths related to firearms, and it showed that the drop did not coincide with the rise in regulation, but with the creation of the FAC.

But I digress. I didn't blog today with the intention of debating gun control, but was merely pointing out some reasons why, when I heard the news of Ben-Hur's death, I couldn't really be bothered. But in his obituary, I learned something that I didn't know....

Charlton Heston isn't his real name. It was John Carter.

Yes, you might wonder why the hell was his name changed from such a manly, easy to say in a western sense name? Well, as it turns out there already was a man named John Carter, and he had been gracing the pages of pulp novels for some time. Only the geeky set would today know about Edgar Rice Burroughs and and his series of novels that started with John Carter of Mars. Wanting to distance himself from the titular character, he changed it to Heston.

I thought that was kinda funny. So that explains why Heston did what he did with the NRA. He'd spent too much time on Mars.

So in honour of this discovery, here's a what if thing that was posted on Ain't It Cool this week.

A RAMBLING MAN...

2008-01-30T10:47:00.000-05:00

It has been a very long time since I posted last, and if you only know about what I’m up to through my blog, then you’d think I was still in Miramichi! Alas, I’m back, and then some. I have traveled more in this year than I have in my entire life. It has been quite a ride. So I thought I’d run through a condensed version of what I’ve been up to since September.

I arrived in Miramichi and thoroughly enjoyed my stay. It was great seeing Robby and the family again. I do find it strange that even though they don’t live here any more, I saw them so infrequently that it doesn’t really feel like they are gone.

On the first day, I got to see Fatkat. It looks like a really nice studio, and the people really seem to be quite nice. I must say that I was really impressed with the place, and once having seen it, I have at least added Miramichi as a possible place to move to.

The second day we went to the beach. I’d never seen the sea before, so this was quite a sight. The place was called Escuminac Park, and they had a nice place to sit and eat lunch in.

On my last day, I went for a walk and found this little path that led down to the shore. It was another hidden gem in the town.

But in the end, I did have a train to catch, and headed back home. Again, I was put in cabin 7, 007 for the trip back. In the end, what I got most out of the trip was to see my friends again, saw a beautiful city, and discovered a love of train travel.

I didn’t go anywhere in October, but in November I went off to Vicky and Anders and tested out my new 3-season tent, and my all season insulating mattress with my sleeping bag that is rated to –12 degrees. It was a lot of fun getting really rugged, and surviving the experience. I was well prepared and supplied. It sounds crazy to try sleeping outside in the snow, even when the temperature dropped to –15 degrees Celsius. I was fine.

The tent look twisted only because in my rush to put the tent up, I forgot to attach the Velcro fasteners on the tent cover to the support poles, so when the weight of the snow pushed on it, it twisted.

Once I had the straps attached, the tent took on its more natural shape.

On the last night, I took my food thermometer into the tent to illustrate just how warm it was inside. It was –5 outside, but inside, as you can see, it was 15 above (it went up past 15 after I took this picture), a full twenty degrees warmer.

The next trip I went on was at Christmas. My brother and I had to go on a family gathering of sorts, which would take us across two provinces, and staying in 5 cities. The car we rented turned out to be a Pontiac Grand Prix GT.

If I may turn into an episode of Top Gear, I have this to say about the car. If I have the stats to the right model, it’s a 3.8L V6 engine with 260 HP. Being used to riding in econo-boxes, this was a very different beast entirely. When you put the foot down to pass another car ahead, it just happens without much fuss. It accelerates in a slow but steady lumbering fashion, but it was strange that once we pulled back into the right lane after passing the other car, you really felt like it was just starting to go. We never did find out where the acceleration petered out and slowed, but that’s because my brother is a very good driver. I think it was lucky that we didn’t come to any corners, or windy roads because I’m not sure how this American Highway car would have reacted. We would have probably ended up in the ditch. I would have to sum up the drive in these terms: “It’s a bit like making love to a woman through a duvet cover. You know there is something really great going on, but you can’t really feel it.” This car separates you from the feel of driving so much that you don’t really feel a part of the driving experience. And that’s not good.

But I digress. We left home and stopped at a place called Grand Falls near the northwestern border of New Brunswick. This was the view out of our motel window. Rather nice I would say.

So the next day we headed out and arrived in Miramichi again to see Rob and his family, and then we headed out to Saint John to see family. Then we went back to Miramichi for Christmas dinner, then the next day we made a beeline for Quebec City. Now I’ve never been there, but this was the view out of the hotel the night we arrived.

I really fell in love with this city. I’ve been saying that if you can’t afford a trip across the Atlantic to see Europe, then Quebec City is the next best thing. We spent the entire stay in the old section of Quebec City.

We found this restaurant called the Continental, which was across the street from the French consulate. We ate dinner there, and I had the best scallops I have ever eaten before. When I go to restaurants, I usually come away feeling a bit unimpressed, as I usually could cook a better dinner myself. At the Continental, I found a dinner that was better than I could, but only just, which I found not only surprising, but made me feel good about my self taught culinary skills.

On our way back home we found Dinosaurs. They didn’t bite, as they were already eating fish.

We made a stop in Montreal to have Chalet Barbecue. It’s a local secret, and they make the best barbecue chicken in town. Forget Swiss Chalet and St. Hubert.

The last trip I went on, of which I only got back last Saturday, was to Windsor Ontario, with a short trip to Detroit. I was doing research for my book that I wrote. I needed to see the places I wrote about and see where I had to tweak things, having seen the place in person. I had a really nice view of Detroit out of my window. So I can now say that Detroit is a beautiful city, from a distance. It was a really incredible experience going around finding out where my character might have lived, worked, and ate. It really blurred the boundary between reality and fantasy, and it was thoroughly rewarding.

So that’s what I’ve been up to. Things are going to calm down from now on I think, and get back to normal. I need to make the alteration with the information I have learned from seeing Windsor and Detroit, and once that’s done, it’s back to work.

2007-09-21T15:28:00.000-04:00

For those of you that might have been wondering, I made it safely. I am now sitting in Rob's house on the East coast! Having made the trip out on VIA rail, I have to say that if someone was to offer me a lift by car, I would turn them down without a thought and take the train every time. I don't have a lot of time, so I will tell you about my trip and then I will have to go.

My friend Sue had at the last minute offered to drive me to the train station. I live so close that although it wasn't necessary, it did give me a chance to see her, as I missed her birthday. So we had a nice lunch and drove off. She even had the good sense to take this picture...

Which is a great way to start my story...

The train left Ottawa more or less on time, and I found it funny that I asked for a window seat, and got this...

...Yeah, that's a window seat. If I turn my head 90 degrees to my side, otherwise I'm looking straight at a wall. Other than that it wasn't all that different than taking a bus, although the handy footrests you find on the bus were curiously absent from the train. I guess it is because the train was older than the fleets of buses. Something I surmised by the ash trays hidden in the armrests. A funny throwback to an older time.

Another throwback which surprised me, and maybe it was just coincidence, was that all the people working on the train from Ottawa to Montreal were black people. I know that was the way things used to be, but it got me wondering if this was just a coincidence, which may be because everyone on the Ocean (the name of the train that took me to the east coast) everyone was white. Segregation is a bad thing...

So anyway, I arrived in Montreal by 5:10 or so, and went up the escalators, and immediately found the ramp to the Miramichi Train, but I had to check something out, something I noticed back in Ottawa. You see just as Sue and I were waiting for me to be allowed onto the train, we saw a line of First Class passengers walk from the lounge area, and board first. Now this time I had a first class ticket and wanted to know the process. So I was told to go to a special Sleeper Class line and check my ticket. I had a very short wait at the line, and was immediately told to go to a special glass enclosed lounge for first class passengers and relax, and that when they were ready, we would be called. I was also asked if I wanted the 6:45 dinner sitting, or the 8:15 dinner in the dinning car. I took the 6:45. So I walked over and had a nice seat, and the first thing that struck me was how quiet it was, compared to the loud roar of the rest of the stadium-like train station. I also found it really funny that the lady calling out the trains that were leaving every few minutes over the PA was giving the traditional 'all aboard' call but spoke in the most annoying artificial radio voice. It just didn't seem to fit.

At any rate, we were summoned at 6:00 pm and our train wasn't scheduled to leave until 6:30, which was weird, because this time I was walking in first watching all the other passengers still sitting or standing in line, out in the noise. So from there my task was to find car 37, which didn't take any time at all because it was near the back where we came down the escalators.

It was a tight squeeze. You had to kind of walk sideways to get through, but it was cool. Now this brings me to the best part. I'm not sure I should tell you because this may give away national secrets that could compromise me and Her Majesty's Secret Service...

Yes, my room number was 7, 007 to be exact. We couldn't leave the extra zeros in, it would have been too obvious. I don't want to make it that easy for SPECTRE.

The room was a lot smaller than I thought it was going to be, and alas it had no shower. I so wanted to be able to say that I had a shower on a moving train, but perhaps another time. All the same I was impressed by the thought that went into trying to cram as much shelving and stuff into the room. It must have been a fun job designing it.

I particularly like this one. Behind the little bathroom window I was able to plug my iPod into the hidden power socket to recharge, and hang my iPod on the glass.

Pretty cool eh? Well, after a short time figuring things out, how the bed folds down, where I can plug my laptop in, what kind of information I get with the room, we got under way. Out of a dark cave, the train emerged out into the skyline of Montreal.

Once underway, I set about looking at my two tickets I had, one was for dinner, and the other was for breakfast. When I figured out which one was which, I noticed that they had put me down for the wrong sitting. I was scheduled for the 8:15, and not the 6:45. As hungry as I was, I decided to see if they had an extra seat. The walk to the dinning car was particularly wobbly because of the bumpy track coming out of Montreal, but having taken a we bit of Aikido, I managed fine (one use for martial arts no one thinks about!) Well, they managed to find me a seat with this nice little old lady from just north of Reno Nevada. She had just retired and was taking the train across Canada. It also turns out that when she was a teenager living in California, she wanted to get into animation, and even interviewed Walt Disney himself! So we had a nice talk! Imagine if VIA had put me down for the 6:45, I would have been seated by myself and I would never had spoken to her!

Which bring me to dinner. There were around four selections, which I chose the smoked salmon and crab-meat salad. I wasn't sure at first if it was going to be good. The smoked salmon and crab were on the side in a little mound, with a bed of leafy greens with a salad dressing on top. I started with the greens and found the dressing so strong that the greens lost their flavour. Once I added the smoked salmon and crab to the party it was something else. I will have to try and make this sometime because it was really good. For me it was the highlight of the meal. Next up I chose the beef tenderloin medallion with a light cream sauce, mixed vegetables and potato. It was quite good, but I'm not sure about the cream sauce. It was low on flavour because you don't want to overpower the taste of the beef, but when it's that delicate a flavour, why bother adding it? Along with the meal I also had a very nice glass of red wine which complemented the meal very well. To finish it all off I ate a great slice of cheesecake with strawberry sauce. I was leery of the cheesecake, since that would be a bad idea after such a heavy meal with my ulcer, but it turned out to be the lightest cheesecake I have ever eaten. Still I was only able to eat most of it. Sadly such a heavy meal with my weak little stomach was difficult. I had to take a glass of bromo selter and then I was fine. In all it was a great dinner capped off by the fact that the sun was setting the whole time.

I had hoped that I was going to have a North By Northwest Eve Marie Saint moment where some hot blond was going to come onto me, but I quickly discovered that everyone my age these days takes the plane. I was the youngest person on board. Everyone else were retired and wanted to see Canada.

I settled into bed and watched Robot Chicken on my laptop!

Unfortunately the picture came out blurry, but you get the idea. I turned in early, because it had been a very long week, and I needed to sleep. I was also going to be arriving in Miramichi at 10:00 am and wanted to get up early to see the sights out the window. I slept well, but I did keep waking up, not because of the rocking of the train, nor by the other people walking by; putting things in their shelves or pulling down their beds. I woke up because I was too hot, so I left the blanket off, and then I got too cold, so I pulled the blanket on, and then I got too hot again. This happened a few times. I think it was because I ate so little this week, that once I got a real meal in me, I had turned into a human furnace from the energy dinner gave me.

When I finally woke up in the morning I casually looked at my watch and it said 6:30. I thought, fine, I'll just get a bit more sleep and go for breakfast later. Then I realized that we had probably crossed the time zone already and that it was really 7:30! I must have slept for 9 hours. So I quickly got up, dressed, and took a look out the window, and freaked. What lay before me was the Gaspe Region. I saw a long stretch of sandy beaches, a huge stretch of river, and in the distance, the mountainous regions of Quebec. Ain't nothing like it in Ontario, and until then it had just been a fun trip on the train. When I looked out that window, it all became real. I was in the East Coast for sure this time. I dove for my camera, whipped it out of my camera bag, pressed the on button, and as I lifted it to take the picture, a wall of trees shot past my window. And there they stayed for the duration of the trip. I had obviously overslept. On the way back I will have to try again, only this time it will be at sunset! Eventually I walked over to the dinning car and ate a simple breakfast of bacon and scrambled eggs. The eggs were served in a a baked potato boat, and I think the eggs were mixed with cream not milk. I also had a cup of coffee and washed it all down with a glass of orange juice. Which turned out to be freshly squeezed orange juice.

Once that was over, I walked to the very back of the train and sat in the observation car until we arrived in Miramichi.

Finally we arrived at Miramichi, and unfortunately this was the best I could do. They didn't have much out the window of the train to see. Then my batteries ran out, so I couldn't take pictures of Bobby and the kids, who conveniently had a day off from school today, as they met me at the train station.

I will have more pictures and stories to tell tomorrow, but so far today, I have seen the new Anderson family house, Fatkat, been to Grant's dinner and had an amazing lunch of breaded scallops. I had to. My grandmother loved scallops.

Now that I have written the longest posting I have ever made, I must go. We're going to have dinner soon, and I mustn't be rude. So far everything has been a blast, and I recommend everyone to try this kind of trip!!!

BULLIES, BOOKS, AND BLLSHT

2007-09-08T10:37:00.000-04:00

For some time now I''ve been planning to make another posting, but with work, my book, my RPG development, Gran Turismo 4, and a touch of laziness, I haven't gotten around to it until now. Long ago I was going to post about having completed the second draft of my book, which is cool. I had taken the printed copy and scribbled all over it with the changes I wanted to make. I even took a picture on the night I finished it!

But there it sat on my desktop, doing nothing until now. But now that I'm getting around to posting again, I have something else to talk about, something more important. I finally finished the book I was reading so that I can get at a new book that has been sitting on my night-table for some time waiting to be read. It's called The Bully, The Bullied, and The Bystander, by Barbara Coloroso.

Why would I be reading a book about bullying at my age? Kind of dumb question, really, when you think about it. Do you think that bullies stop being bullies when they grow up? Hell no. When someone learns aggressive or inappropriate ways of dealing with people, they learn that for life. You can even transpose this kind of behavior on the world, because countries are ruled by people, so it is logical to assume that countries will behave like people too. Think about what is going on in the Darfur region right now. It's easy to look at the Darfur as the weird kid off alone on the side. No one really likes him, and he's getting picked on, but no one does anything about it even though they can. They all sit back as bystanders. The sad thing is, is that the opposition in Darfur is not very strong, they could be stopped easily, especially by the United States, the toughest kid on the block), but they are too absorbed in their own selfish interests. But it isn't the responsibility of the United States to fix conflicts like this, it's all of ours.

Why should you read this book? If you have kids, you really need this book, because your kids are for sure going to get bullied. if you've ever been bullied, you need to read this to clear up some of the thoughts you may have about the experience, because whether you realize it or not, you have been shaped by the experience. This book is like a primer on understanding some basic concepts of human interaction, and I've found it to be an incredible eye opener. A lot of the ideas so far are things you may already know, but it still puts it all into a context that is far more reaching than you think.

Do yourself a favour, whether you are a parent or not, read this book!!!
The Bully, The Bullied, and the Bystander...

CONTEMPLATING SUICIDE...

2007-07-05T19:45:00.000-04:00

Okay, maybe not, but you have to admit it's a headline grabber.

Well work has been pretty stupid, and my life outside work hasn't been much better, so I got together with my brother for dinner to commiserate our misfortune, and bake a cake. Yes it was a very manly get together, full of testosterone and fighting. Nothing like baking a cake to make you feel like a real man.

So this was our plan. We were going to mix up a batch of brownies, using the recipe on the side of the Fry's Cocoa container (with the addition of a tablespoon of Tim Horton's English Toffee Cappuccino mix added. It's a sweet addition that my brother came up with). But in this case, we split the mix between two-cake trays and I mixed up a batch of chocolate sour cream icing. We took the brownie cakes out of the oven much too early, so that it would still be very moist, and after it was cool, smothered it in icing.

I must say it was really good, a bit too good. I had one small piece after making the thing on Tuesday, and I'm only having my second piece today. On Thursday! It's such a rich, sweet desert it takes two full days to recover before you can have more. It's a true kamikaze dish, because you've got to question your sanity to want to eat anything like this!!!!

Over and out....

PAGES, PAGES, PAGES...

2007-06-20T22:23:00.000-04:00

Well after battling laziness, horrible diseases, food poisoning, work, stress, and anxiety, and a lack of things to post, I finally came up with something.

I’ve started re-writing my book. I’m already through the first part and getting into the second, really hefty middle part. I have a lot to do, but after leaving it alone for some time, I'm pleased to say that I’m not cringing from going over my first attempts to write a book. There are many things to fix if I want it to work as a cohesive story with a point, but I can see the shape of things. There’s something there in the clay, and I have more bits to whittle off, but It wasn't a waste of time. Sorry to use that tired metaphor, but it was there and handy.

I’m going through it fast, so that even though I’m behind schedule, I know I will catch up fast. Plus it gives me an excuse to hang out on my deck and relax, listen to music, and keep tabs on my iChat.

I’ll have more later.

Help!!!!

2007-05-10T21:57:00.000-04:00

Sorry I've been neglecting my postings recently. I'll try to come up with an interesting new post this weekend. I have three simple words to explain what has kept me from posting.

Work, sick, Facebook.

'Nuff said.

KOHLBERG’S STAGES OF MORAL DEVELOPMENT

2007-04-01T21:20:00.000-04:00

I looked about the net for info regarding something my Mother showed me when she was taking a Psychology course in University regarding moral behaviour. A man by the name of Lawrence Kohlberg came up with a theory, which became known as Kohlberg’s Stages of Moral Development.

Kohlberg’s theory states that there are 6 stages of moral reasoning that determine
the ethical behaviour of an individual. He believed that as you grow and learn, you have the potential to grow morally throughout your life.

There are three stages that the 6 levels are split between. Levels 1 and 2 are in the Pre-Conventional stage.

The Pre-Conventional stage is most common with children, though many adults never rise above this stage.

Level 1, you behave because if you don’t you get punished. Fear of punishment is at the bottom end of the morality scale.

Level 2, you behave because you know that you will be rewarded for it.

The Conventional Stage is where most adults end up, and cover the 3rd and 4th stages of moral development.

Level 3, you do good things because you see that there is value to the inevitable approval of others you know.

Level 4, you behave because that is the law. This type of person believes that laws are an important part of keeping society in order, and to disobey them is morally wrong.

The Post-Conventional stage covers levels 5 and 6. I should point out that Kohlberg found very few people rose to this level, and that he had a hard time trying to find anyone who genuinely fit the level 6 definition.

Level 5, you do good things because you recognize that you are an individual part of a greater society and that a person’s views must become part of their moral reasoning. This kind of person sees laws as important, but as only guidelines, and that laws should promote prosperity for all.

Level 6, you do good things because they are right. You help people not because you want to avoid punishment, get a reward or peer approval, it doesn ’t even matter if you like the person you’re helping. You do it because it’s right. This person sees laws not only as guidelines, but that one should ignore ones that are unjust, and that just laws are ones that benefit everyone, not just a select few.

So how do we fare in such a scale? Most of us fall into the Conventional reasoning of levels 3 and 4. You may agree with levels 5 and 6 and think you fit there, but
honestly look back in your life and think about the choices you’ve made and the actions attributed to you. You’d be hard pressed to find anyone in level 6.

Why did I bring this up? Well, let’s face it, the world is a pretty ugly place sometimes, with bad people doing bad things, and good people doing nothing; Kohlberg’s Levels of Moral Reasoning is something that stuck with me. I think it could be a way of bettering the world, not through more religion, more politics, more capitalism or communism, or any of the million ism’s. If we can nudge people a bit higher up the Moral Reasoning scale through education, then maybe things would improve. It’s at the very least a way of measuring where we are, morally as a society, and where we need to end up if we are to survive.

BACK ON THE ROAD...

2007-03-18T21:35:00.000-04:00

I had finished writing the first draft of my book on January 15th of this year, and I said to myself that I would put it all away, and forget the whole thing for two months, clear my head and come back to it later. As of Thursday, those two months are over, and I have now begun the challenging and exciting process of writing the second draft of my book. It might take me all year to get it into a shape that I'm happy with, but by the end of the year, I plan to begin the process of shopping it around to publishers and literary agents. I might get to that earlier, depending on how fast I get through the rewrites.

I have always considered myself better at re-writing, than writing, so it should be an interesting journey. I'm excited about doing the second draft, because while the first draft is all about getting it done, the second draft is all about making it better! I'm all about making it better!!

This experience has been the most emotional and creative endeavors I have ever undertaken, and I look forward to seeing where it all takes me.

Hopefully further than down the street...

On a completely unrelated note, I should point out that I have finally set up my links properly, and they should all be working, so feel free to go on a journey and explore the kinds of sites I like to travel to.

LEGALISED CRACK!!!!!!!

2007-03-15T20:34:00.000-04:00

Well I know I’ve gone overboard with cooking on my Blog as of late, but I have one more for you. Tonight I made cinnamon buns, using the recipe from the TV show Good Eats. It’s quite a production, and if you have the time, it’s well worth it.

You have to prepare the dough, roll it, and then put it in the fridge overnight to develop flavour, and then you bake it the next day.

This is what they looked like after a day in the fridge.

This is what they looked like after coming out of the oven.

And this is what they looked like after I drenched them in cream cheese icing.

Yep, it’s legal crack as far as I’m concerned. And I don’t plan to share them.

Mustn’t give away the precious!

BACK TO WORK

2007-03-11T11:01:00.000-04:00

I just thought I'd take a moment to make a quick post until I had the time to put up a real post later. I'm back at work now, and have a lot less time to blog, but I will try to keep a weekly schedule at the very least.

I should comment on the surprising comments I had on the previous post, about acting. I found it funny that no one I know posted on this subject, except Tracy, which tells me that either my regulars didn't want to comment on my thoughts on acting, or they felt the need to do so anonymously. If the latter was the case, I didn't realize that acting was such a touchy subject matter!

Well, until I have the time to talk about something important, have a look at some Almond Cookies I baked for my Mom yesterday.

OPENED FACE, CLOSED FACE...

2007-02-28T10:08:00.000-05:00

I thought I’d take a break from my cooking escapades and talk about something that I enjoy more than cooking. Film. I had planned to make this post earlier, but I had wanted to include video clips to prove my point, but that will not be possible, since you can only post links and pictures, not video. So… I will do my best to state my case without the aid of video.

There is a film term that refers to actors, who either have an “open face” or a “closed face.” This term simply refers to whether you can place a camera in front of the actor’s face and see them think while they are acting. Some people have very expressive eyes that dance, glisten and are very active and ’alive’ for the benefit of the camera. This is somewhat unnecessary in theatre, but in film, it becomes very important. Most of the famous actors you know have this. A lot of the actors you know and like pull you into the story because of their eyes. They are the windows to the soul as they say.

There are some actors however, who manage to be very successful, even though they don’t have opened faces. This is not to say that they aren’t good actors, but because the eyes are so important to film, they are better suited to theatre. In theatre, the eyes are almost unimportant, because most audience members are going to be sitting too far away to clearly see them, at least not as closely as in film.

It’s easy to see why some actors can be so successful even though they lack the ability to leap off the screen. Most of you have heard of the 1920’s experiment by Russian filmmakers Pudovkin and Kuleshov where they filmed a man staring blankly into the camera, and intercut the footage with other images, like a bowl of soup, a coffin, a dead woman, a little girl. Everyone who saw the footage were amazed by the acting of the man, even though he was doing absolutely nothing but looking into the camera blankly. Some actors may go through the motions and gestures of acting, but without the expression in their eyes, on film, they look like they are lying. Most people don’t see this because of the incredible power of editing.

The next time you see a movie, or TV show, ask yourself, “how much am I bringing to the performance?”

Don’t believe me? Fine, but try this… Cup your hands around your eyes, or cut out a hole in a piece of paper or cardboard so that you can only see the eyes of the actor you see on TV. Pay attention to what you see or don’t see in their eyes. Can you see what they are thinking? Better still. Turn the volume off, and see if the actor is communicating to you with their eyes. Can they get across complicated emotions to you? Are they telling the story just with their eyes?

Now I’m not suggesting that having expressive eyes make a good actor, but it is one of the most important tools a film actor has. If an actor doesn’t have it, they have a handicap that prevents them from being truly great in that medium. In film it is so important that some actors can get by without any acting skills at all, because of their eyes.

What actors am I talking about? The most famous actors that I can think of that have closed faces, are Johnny Depp, and Orlando Bloom. I don’t care how popular they are, most people get something out of their performances because of what the audience brings to the table. Their eyes tell us nothing. Try the experiment I mentioned above and you will see. Their acting skills go part of the distance, and the viewer goes the rest.

Take a look at the film Kingdom of Heaven. I actually liked the movie, but the film’s greatest flaw is Orlando Bloom. There is a scene in the beginning of the film where the camera is up close on his face as he thinks about his dead wife and son. He’s supposed to be so overcome with grief that he feels dead inside, but does he look it? Nope. If you look into his eyes, he may be thinking about what groceries he needs to buy later, or wondering what he’s having for lunch. Who knows, but the point is, is that as an actor, his eyes can’t tell us.

On the flipside, there is Lawrence of Arabia. I mention this film because it is the kind of film that Kingdom of Heaven tried to be. There is a scene near the end where the Arabian army led by Peter O’Toole comes across a detachment of the Turkish army. The Arabs want to slaughter them, but they are trying to reach Damascus before the British, and to stop and fight would mean disaster. So the scene is very simply shot. We have Peter O’Toole in the foreground with Omar Sharif beside him. Omar, the only man with any sense, is trying to convince Peter not to attack. Peter’s face is alive and moving. He is just standing there, but his emotions are taking over to an extent that he looks like he is going to explode. You can see his bloodlust rising, his revulsion for it, and his hesitation to give into it. Omar is just as alive in the scene, as he greatly admires Lawrence, and doesn’t want to see him sink so low. This is one if the most powerful scenes in film history for a reason. There is so much more than I mentioned going on in the frame here, but for a great part, most of the emotion we see, and feel in the scene depends on what we see in their eyes. Have a look at the picture above. It’s from that scene. Better yet, go see that movie now.

Who has an opened face? Peter O’Toole, Michael Cain, Nicole Kidman, Jack Nicholson, Meryl Streep, Sidney Poitier, Rod Steiger, Omar Sharif… You know, I think I’ll stop here, because it is the exception that a film actor doesn’t have an ‘open face’ and I could go on forever.

Filmmaking is a collaborative process. It’s more than the stunt-people, make-up, and wardrobe that makes an actor look good. You mustn’t forget the director, editor, and the cast that surrounds them. Often they are more important.

GRAINS, WHEAT, AND RICE...

2007-02-17T10:26:00.000-05:00

Someone made a posting regarding my Pizza, asking if there was a low fat version of the recipe. This is something that I felt I had to comment on because there are some very basic things that people do not realize about the whole eating healthy thing.

To put it simply, there is no such thing as a low fat pizza. Don’t think you can slap on some tofu cheese and think it’s going to be healthy I’m afraid. Why? Because no matter what toppings you put on a pizza it’s still a huge portion of bread, and the bread is going to add weight to your body more than the cheese will.

Now before you switch to another website and ignore this posting, thinking that I’m one of those anti-carb fanatics, because I’m not. Our brain needs glucose to burn in order for it to survive, so it’s not a good thing to cut out of your diet. There are also some very healthy things in a lot of grains that the body needs as well.

Now having said this, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t understand two very true and factual things that any nutritionist or diet planner with more than two brain cells will tell you:

1 Everybody processes energy differently. Some people pack on the pounds easier than others, and if this is the case, than you are going to have to adjust your eating habits if you want to lose weight. You will have to eat less of certain things than others, and balance health vs. portions.

2 Carbs are sugar! Carbs are very simple molecule structures that get digested and broken down into the body very quickly. They are made of monosaccharides, like glucose, galactose, and fructose. You know, those ose’s. Sugar!!!

So no matter how healthy that slice of 47 grain whole wheat bread you plan to eat is, and they are healthy, when your body breaks it down, it is still sugar! It’s just not as refined a sugar as the white stuff we buy in stores. But in the end, what’s the difference. If you eat enough of the stuff, you might as well be eating a candy bar, which would be the case if you eat a lot of pizza.

So I’m not saying people should stop eating carbs, what I’m saying is that the more refined the carb is (like white flour, even whole wheat flour or any kind of starch) you might as well consider it a sugar portion.

So eat brown rice, whole grains, but in moderation, because the body will turn it into sugar. Now if you don’t exercise, you should be eating even less of the stuff. Pasta, bread, and even high starch potatoes, carrots, beets are all things that are great if you’re a marathon runner or doing something where your body runs like a sports car, but if you’re like the most of us, you don’t need too many carbohydrates. Remember, the stuff is solid rocket fuel in the human body, and unless you are very active, the excess energy will be turned to fat.

So I’m not an anti-carb fanatic. I think people just need to understand the science of the human body more. Whole grains are still sugar, but a healthy sugar, just like olive oil is a healthy oil. But anything in excess is a bad thing.

Don’t believe me? Don’t. Go look for yourself, and learn that carbs in all its forms, no matter how healthy the delivery system is, is still a sugar.

HOME MADE PIZZA

2007-02-08T23:17:00.000-05:00

I had a pizza party on Monday, which was fun, but I was trying out a new pizza dough recipe I learned from the TV show Good Eats. It was fun trying out the new recipe, and my table top mixer. Despite how much fun it was, the recipe turned out to be a thin crust pizza, which I'm not fond of, and it was really salty. So I had to come up with my own. Having experimented with several pizza dough recipes, I have settled on my own version which I have put out here for you all to enjoy.

So you have two choices, if you plan to make home made pizza. Try out this recipe, or invite me over for dinner, and I will bring my own dough balls.

I will resist the temptation to turn that into something dirty.

Pizza Dough

Ingredients:
3 3/4 cups of Bread Flour
2 Tablespoons of Sugar
1/2 Tablespoon of Salt
1 1/2 Tablespoons of Olive Oil
2 1/2 Teaspoons of Quick Rise Instant Yeast
1 1/2 cups of hot ( no warmer than 140 degrees centigrade) Filtered or Mineral Water. (Why mineral or filtered? Because tap water has chlorine in it and that will kill the yeast!)

*IMPORTANT NOTE* Making good pizza dough takes time. This recipe should be started 24 hours before you plan to actually make the pizza!

1 In a table mixer, add the sugar, water and then the yeast. Cover the bowl with a tea towel and let it sit for 10 to 15 minutes, or until the yeast has foamed up.

2 Add the flour (3 1/2 cups using the scoop and sweep method), olive oil and then the salt. Mix until combined.

3 Change the mixer to the dough hook, and knead for 15 minutes, or until a small piece of dough can be flattened out and stretched into a very thin membrane.

4 Take the dough ball and place it onto a clean work surface, and flatten it out. Turn the edges in on themselves as if you are making a jellyfish and keep pulling tight on that side until the rounded end becomes tight as a drum.

5 Take the dough ball and place it onto a clean work surface with the tight, rounded end facing up. Wrap your hands around the sides of the dough ball and roll it between your hands, without moving your fingers. The act of moving the ball around in a circular pattern will further pull the ball tighter. Once done, cover it with a tea towel, and let it sit for 1 hour.

5 Divide the dough into two equal portions, and repeat steps 4 and 5 with each portion of the dough.

6 Place each dough ball in a metal or plastic bowl, and add a bit of olive oil to and toss to coat (don’t add more than 1 tablespoon of oil). Place the dough in the fridge for 24 hours. The dough will probably double in size, and that is a good thing.

*IMPORTANT NOTE* Do not attempt to try to form and cook the dough without waiting the 24 hours. The dough will be so tight and mealy that you won’t be able to evenly flatten it out and flip it to the desired size. Trust me, I know, because I’ve tried. Waiting the 24 hours radically changes the chemical composition of the dough and makes it much easier to work with.

7 After 24 hours, flatten out each ball of dough, one at a time, and toss it between each of your hands, holding it by the edges, rotating the dough as you go. This will spread the dough out evenly around, while keeping about an inch of the outer edge of the dough much thicker. This becomes the crust, and assists in flipping. Flip the dough in the air, like you’ve seen done at fancy restaurants or TV. There really is a good reason for doing this; it’s not just for show. The thicker, outer edges of the dough, gets pulled from the center axis when it is spinning in the air, and this action spreads the dough out to the desired shape. If you use a rolling pin to shape your dough, you loose the thick crust edge, because the dough will be uniform in thickness. Sometimes science tastes good!

8 Sprinkle some cornmeal out on your pizza pan and place your dough on it, and put on whatever toppings you want.

*IMPORTANT NOTE* Don’t put a lot of sauce down, or your toppings will slide off, but if you like a messy pizza… If you go over 3 toppings + cheese, you may be overloading your pizza, but if you like a messy pizza…

9 Put your pizza in a preheated oven at 450 degrees, for 15 minutes, or until the cheese has begun to brown.

Once all this is done, you might end up with a nice pizza like the one I made today (see the above picture).

DINNER IN 8 MINUTES...

2007-02-04T10:04:00.000-05:00

Okay, you’ve just got home from work, and you are not only really tired, but also very hungry. We’ve all been there, and I have here a recipe for a dinner that only takes 8 minutes to make, including preparation and cooking time. The only problem with the recipe is that it isn’t good for dieters, because it includes a Ramen Noodle package.

On the plus side, it’s incredibly fast, and very cheap.

What do you need?

1 Ramen Noodle Package (I usually go with the Shrimp flavour. ‘Cause it goes with the Shrimp or seafood I put into it.)

1/4 cup of frozen Shrimp, fake Crab meat, or firm Tofu

1/2 Green Onion, chopped

1/2 cup of Snow Peas, or maybe Napa Cabbage, or Carrots (chopped finely). You can use any vegetable you like, really. This is a very forgiving recipe.

1 very small saucepot. You want one that is so small that the bundle of noodles barely fit in it. If the corners of the noodles get crunched a bit trying to get it in, you have the right size.

How do you make it?

1 Start by filling the saucepot with 1 full cup of water, and place it on the stove element on the highest heat your stove has.

2 While the water is heating, cut off the stem ends of the Snow Peas, or chop up whatever vegetables you are using. Also chop up the Green Onion.

3 You don’t need to do anything with the Shrimp, but if you are using Crab meat or Tofu, chop that up as well.

4 By the time all the chopping is done, the water is usually boiling by now.

5 Once the water begins to boil. Add the whole flavour package and stir to combine, but do this quickly! With every second you are losing water! Then add the Ramen Noodle bundle, and set your timer for 3 minutes (or whatever recommended cooking time is written on the noodle packaging).

6 As soon as the noodles are in the pot dump your Shrimp, Crab, or Tofu in and then pour the vegetables over top of that. Keep the pot boiling on the highest heat your stove top can muster, and let it sit for 3 minutes!

7 Once the cooking time is over, just turn the pot over into a big bowl and sprinkle some fresh cracked pepper (or regular if that’s all you have), and the Green Onion. Adding a dash of Sesame Oil if you have any is good too.

I hope you try this out and enjoy it. Not many dinners can be made in the time it takes for water to boil (plus 3 minutes)

Tips:

Do you balk at the thought of cooking with Shrimp! You say, “Shrimp is too expensive?” Believe me I agree. So what I do is get the frozen Salad Shrimp when it’s on sale. One small bag of the stuff will make plenty of this. Still too expensive? Try Giant Tiger; they sell Shrimp rings for $3 to $4. The only problem is that you have to take the tails off, or not if you don’t mind taking them off in you bowl. That can work just as well, and it’s less time consuming.

INSTANT GOURMET FOOD!!

2007-01-24T10:39:00.000-05:00

A good friend of mine once lamented the time it takes to make healthy food. No offense intended to my friend, but to that I say Pah! Most people share this complaint, and so I have taken it upon myself to disprove this myth!!

First off. Eating healthy is all about ingredients. What takes time is your method of cooking. A lack of time only limits what you can cook and how. It doesn’t prevent you from cooking healthy.

I’ll say that again. A lack of time only limits what you can cook and how. It doesn’t prevent you from cooking healthy.

I think the real problem is that most people don’t know what their options are when it comes to cooking because you probably have to either go to cooking school, or religiously watch the Food Network for a year like I have. Since most of you don’t have the time for that, I have taken it upon myself to come up with quick, easy recipes that not only don’t take any time to prepare (and cook), but are healthy and very cheap.

For my first recipe, I have a fish pouch! It takes 15 minutes or less to prepare, and takes 15 or 30 minutes to cook, depending on how you prepare it. The cool thing is that you don’t have to use any of the ingredients I used if you don’t want them. What I am showing is a METHOD of cooking that will allow you to make easy, fast, healthy, and tasty foods!

What do you need?

The Hardware
1 medium sized bowl
Parchment Paper (though aluminum Foil will work too)
One Baking Sheet

The Food

1/3 of a cup of Bulgur Wheat (though any small grain will do)
One of those super cheap bags of frozen fish (usually they are 3 to 5 bucks each)
A handful of fresh beans
Two carrots
A small sprig of fresh Sage
One green onion
One Shitake mushroom

And now for the Sauce and Seasoning

Salt
Pepper
Soup Broth
Sherry Cooking Wine
Worcester Sauce

Okay, now on to making the thing.

Fist. Preheat your oven to 400 degrees. By the time you are done making this, your oven will be hot.

Chop up the carrots. To save time I recommend NOT peeling them. It really doesn’t change the flavour; it’s still a carrot. Just wash them first. Don’t have enough time? Try cutting the ends off the carrots and breaking them up into three pieces with your hands. Just remember that if you do this, you probably want to use thinner carrots, because it may take longer to cook thicker ones. If you have peeled baby carrots, even better, because you don’t have to do anything to them (more on how to preserve them on another show).

Wash and chop the ends off the beans, I like to do more than one at a time to speed this up. You don’t need to chop these. That’s what the knife and fork are for when you are eating them.

Slice the mushrooms in whatever way is quickest for you.

Dice the Sage, or whatever herb you happen to like with fish. For even faster prep, use dried.

Then get out your fish. Cut any pieces that wont fit evenly in the bowl you have. One of those bags will have enough fish for two batches of this recipe.

Okay, now you want to get your bowl. Why the bowl? Well what you are going to be doing is piling food into a pocket of parchment paper, and unless you are cooking Lego blocks, they aren’t going to stay put, especially when you pour in the sauce. The bowl keeps everything in place.

Tear off a big sheet of parchment paper and push one side of it into the bowl as shown. You want to have enough of the paper to one side so that you will be able to fold it over and seal it.

Pour in 1/3 of a cup of Bulgur Wheat. You can use whatever grain you want though.

Next, layer a couple or a few pieces of fish on top.

Then throw on your veggies.

Next up is the herbage.

Now comes the Sauce. In a small bowl, mix up about 1/3 of a cup of soup broth (I used Organic Chicken broth), then one Tablespoon of Sherry Cooking Wine (though any wine will do. Put in what you like), and Two Tablespoons of Worcester Sauce. Mix.

Now sprinkle about 1/2 a teaspoon of salt on your pile of food (give up on the table salt and use kosher, sea, or anything but table salt. It tastes like a chemical refinery), and a few dashes of pepper. Then pour the sauce over the food.

Now fold over the other end of the parchment paper, and starting at one of the folds, twist the paper. Move a bit further along, and twist it tightly.

Keep twisting the paper along the edge. I know it looks complicated, but it really is much easier than it looks.

Then when you get to the fold at the other end, twist it into a tight point.

There. Now you have a parchment paper pocket. It is definitely easier with foil, but I find that a lot of the food ends up sticking to it after cooking, so I go with the paper. It’s more biodegradable too.

Now carefully move your pouch out of the bowl and onto a metal baking sheet. You have lot of water in there, but don’t worry. Parchment paper is water resistant. Put the whole thing in the oven for 15 minutes, or 30 if you are using frozen fish.

Come back when it’s done, and you get this.

Then you can move it to whatever plates you want and eat. Or you can eat it out of the paper if you want.

So there you have it. The measurements I used took a bit of time to figure out, so that there would be enough water to puff up the Bulgur and steam the rest of the food, but it is a very versatile meal and any ingredient can be replaced for another. The only reason I used what I used was because that was what I had in my fridge at the time. It took me 15 minutes to fully prepare, but depending on the vegetables and how you chop them it could take even less time.

Sound good. Put in 15 minutes of work, and wait another 15 or 30 minutes and dinner is done. It tastes good too. You also don’t have to wash any pots. So the next time you find yourself complaining as you slave over the stove, don't blame the food, get better recipes.

I will have another one later involving ramen noodles that can be made in 8 minutes, including cooking time!

A FUNNY THING HAPPENED ON THE WAY TO STAPLES

2007-01-16T14:44:00.000-05:00

Well as you may have guessed by the photo above, I am done. Yes. I am done. Three very simple words that sum up an awful lot of work.

I finished the first draft of the book at around 12:30 in the morning Sunday night, backed up three copies of it, and then spent the next hour and a half trying to calm down enough to go to sleep. I have been very quiet about the book’s plot, but I think, for those that know me, it’s a safe bet to assume that the story is a big adventure story, because it is. Now in order to write anything that is remotely interesting, I had to believe I was there, and the closer I got to the end of the book, the more intense it became to write. So, for me, it was the most intense writing experience I have ever had. It was visceral, fun, but very tiring. In fact I have been pretty consistent at writing about 10 pages a day for three or four days a week, since August. The most I had written in one day was 15 pages. On Sunday I wrote 30 pages. I don’t know what came over me, or how I was able to do it, but that’s how my Sunday went.

When I finished the book, it came in at a whopping 482 pages and 183 202 words. I didn’t realize that it would take that much to say what I had to say. I had an even bigger surprise on Monday morning when I headed off to Staples to print the thing off. They didn’t have the font I used, so the 12 point font it was printed on was apparently significantly larger than the 12 point font I wrote it in. So it printed out 576 pages!!!! There’s a lesson for all of us! Not all fonts are the same, even if you use the same points in the font!

I obviously now have no idea how many pages my book is. I will have to do more research and find a standard print font that even Staples has, and reformat it all. But that is what the second draft is for.

I think the problem I am going to have is that most people are going to take a look a 500+ page book and assume that the story meanders, and that I couldn’t be more efficient with the writing. That isn’t the case. The story is quite action packed. I have no patience with self-indulgence, so I don’t waste time with my plot.

So now the plan is to get plenty of rest, and then wait a month or two before re-writing the book. I plan to take the next year to sculpt the book into something that I feel comfortable sending out to publishers and agents. At least now I have something. I can actually say I wrote a book, though it will mean more if I get published.

THE RETURN OF THE SAVAGE...

2007-01-12T09:46:00.000-05:00

Well, I'm back. A few of you have been wondering where I've been all this time, so I thought I tell you what's up and where I've been.

I took a break from Blogging for two reasons, one I was getting heavily full time in my writing, AND I thought no one was looking at my blogg site. In an effort to avoid junk mail I didn't want to give any personal info that is asked for when you get a site counter, I have also, unfortunately given up any way of knowing how much site traffic I get. Now I think anyone who has a Blogg site has to admit to a little need for peer gratification. Without the site counter, and because most people don't leave comments I felt like I was putting in a lot of work with no audience, and for an artist the audience is everything. I know it sounds childish, and I'm not denying that, but I'm just being honest. If I’m going to spend time talking, I’d at least like to know people are listening.

So I will just assume people are watching and post more often, since I have had requests from people to post more often.

Okay, now what has happened since the last posting? I went to the Ottawa Swing Dance Association and hung out there. They have a very well run machine, which makes for a lot of fun, even if you're nervous. There is no high school sitting on the sidelines here. They pair you up in a circle that staggers from boy to girl all around, and you switch constantly. This prevents any embarrassment of "oh I don't want to dance with you 'cause you look funny' crap going on, because you HAVE to dance with the next person in line. It was a good thing to do, but ultimately it isn't what I'm looking for. I still intend to go occasionally but with all the loud music and dancing, you never get to know people. All you get to see is what people look like, and if that's all you're interested in, great, go to it. But for me, as much as I like a sexy looking woman as the next guy, it's what the person is like that is most important. It's too important to me to want to know what a person is like before even wanting to date someone. I have a saying; "don't judge a present by the pretty wrapping." What I mean is, you could be the hottest looking person out there, but if you are selfish and insensitive? Trust me, you're ugly. So I will be looking for things to do that will put me in a position to meet girls and TALK to them.

Now what else has happened? Well I am literally days away from finishing my book. Yeah, I said finishing it. It has been a long road, this year, and a lot learned, both about writing and about myself. I have two or three chapters to go, and I will have finished the first draft, then I get to take a break and come back to it. I'm a long way from sending it out to publishers, but it is still no small feat to accomplish, especially since I am on page 452, and I'm not done yet. Yup, it's a big one, but I kinda have the belief that if you smack someone in the face with your book, and it doesn't hurt? Then it's not a book. Yes I like a good, long story, as long as it's good. Hopefully others who read mine will feel the same way about it. One never knows. I have never even published a short story.

I dreamed up the idea for this book in February and started to develop the plot. It wasn't until a month or so after than I thought about writing the ideas as a book. Then I had to write the outlines, because there are three books in the series. Once that was done, I wasn't able to start writing until August. So I'm pretty proud of how fast I have written the thing.

Now, early on, I learned some very hard and obvious lessons on writing that apply to art in general. If you feel you have to wait for inspiration to write, you are going to have a hard time doing it professionally. You need to be able to sit down at any time and work, and get something done. Imagine working at a cash register and find you can't do it until you get inspiration. You'd get fired pretty fast. Professionals need to be able to sit down and perform without hesitation. Now, I’m not putting myself in the company of professional writers because, like I said, I’ve never published even a short story, but I have managed to write a book that is going to be over 450 pages in about 5 or 6 months, so I like to think I have something to say about discipline. If you can't do that, don't worry, because there are many reasons why that have nothing to do with "not having the talent." You probably do, you just need to find ways that make you comfortable enough to write, draw, or whatever it is you do. Now I need to expand on this concept, because even though I have forced myself to sit and write on a daily basis whether I was inspired or not. This is what gets the work done, and every now and then you get your 'inspiration' and do you best work. When you are in the zone, you do your best work, but if you wait for those times, you'll have a hard time getting things accomplished. So don't worry if what you are writing, drawing or doing isn't your best, you are still working! And that is key. You can always come back and fix it later. That's what 2nd, 3rd, and 4th drafts are for.

What did I do when I wasn't in the mood to write? Well I sat out on my deck, weather permitting, and wrote. Or I'd get up and head over to the local Bridghead and grab a tea and a seat and write. It was funny because in my mind I was there to write, and I was able to trick my mind into thinking that people are going to notice I wasn’t' doing what I was there to do, and so I should get to work. The other thing is music. For a lot of people, music is key, and for me it was, is, and will always be paramount. If there is music that makes your mind click into gear and get active (and I don't mean dance, unless that's what you are trying to do), then use it to get motivated. Whatever the answer is for you, be it location, audio, visual, or even olfactory stimulation, these things all get you working, and if you can get into a groove for a full day, what you are doing is tempering yourself to put in a full day's work. You’re learning discipline, and that is crucial if you want to get the job done. You just need to take the time to explore what motivates you to work.

If this book ever gets published I am going to have to say a big thanks to the film composers whose music has inspired this book. For me, film music is like another instrument in the jazz band in my head. I listen to a piece of music, and wonder what could be going on to the sounds (because unlike ALL other form of music, film scores are designed to play alongside images). So I make up stuff, and listening to music has allowed me to imagine key elements to my stories. Hell, I got the ending to all three of the books from listening to three different pieces of music.

But I should probably go now. After rambling about discipline, I have to work, and finish the damn thing. But at any rate, I will try to post more often, and see how it goes.

Later.